Scribblings

Happy Halloween!

Linda's sleep apnea test

Linda has a sleep study tonight to see if she has sleep apnea. I would imagine that the procedure is the same as the one I had in 2002. She’ll go to the sleep study and get wired up to all these machines. She’ll sleep long enough for the techs to determine whether or not she has sleep apnea. If she does, they’ll wake her up and give her a CPAP machine and mask and have her go back to sleep. While she’s sleeping, they’ll be adjusting the air pressure to whatever is appropriate for her needs. I know that she’d rather not have it but if she does it’s better for her health to get it taken care of now.
We all need to lose weight. That would go a long way to ending our sleep apnea problems. It doesn’t help that I am eating these M&M almonds. My nerves are still jingling and jangling because the stress continues. Anyway, Linda’s got to get going in about an hour. Little T will sleep in our room tonight. I wonder if TB and I will get any sleep? Oh well. It’s just one night.

Hump Day Hoo-hah:

01. Do you believe that Democrats can get away with more questionable activities than Republican? If not, why?

No I don’t and the reason is that the press are equal opportunity crucifiers. Once it’s in the paper or on TV, it doesn’t matter if the perp is a Republican or a Democrat

02. Is it okay under any circumstances to bring up a candidate’s family? (ie - Cheney’s *Lesbian* Daughter)

It depends. Are secrets being spilled? No? The cold hard truth is that the candidate’s family is open to people digging around in their closets. There’s no such thing as hands off the family any more.

03. Which party do you agree with most? Democrat, Republican or Other? And why?

I most agree with the Democrats this time. I think Bush rushed us into an unnecessary war where we are the only ones funding it and the only ones taking casualties. I think Bush’s economic plan sucks. I like Kerry’s ideas better than I do Bush’s.

04. If you had to name one politician that you admire or even think they are one-of-a-kinda. Who would you pick and why?

Oh man. I don’t admire any politicians. One of a kind? Bill Clinton, our Democratic Teflon president. He actually wasn’t a bad president except for this huge moral failing he had with Monica Lewinsky. He did manage to have the budget balanced during his administration. And he was really cool playing the sax.

05. When was the first election you were able to vote in? Was it presidential or not? And did those people you vote for, get in?

I first voted for Gerald Ford in 1976 (I think) and Jimmy Carter won that year. Yes, it was presidential.

06. Do you have a strict view of the constitution or are you willing to be more liberal with our national’s more honored document?

I would say I’m right in the middle. It depends on which part of the Constitution we are talking about

07. Will there be a draft and if so – would you go if you’re number is called?

I am too old to be drafted. Old people send young people to war. :P

08. Should Same-Sex Marriage be legal in ALL 50 states?

I think each state should decide what they want to do about same sex marriage

09. What about our economy? Is it up or is it down?

President Bush says it’s up. What planet is he on? I say it’s down, down, down.

10. Why do you think people dislike President Bush so much?

He is arrogant and unwilling to admit to mistakes. He thinks he knows what is best for our country and won’t change his ways no matter what. Also, he gives the impression that he is a personal confidant of God.

11. Best President the United States has ever had?

FDR, Franklin Delano Roosevelt

12. Is there a politician from your state – that you wish would crawl back into whatever hole they came out of and if so - why?

I wish they would all crawl back into their holes, all these local cut throat politicians. I am so sick of the negativity, I could just puke!

13. Do you think military should be our number one concern and if you don’t think so, why not?

Our number one concern should be the protection of our people here which not only means defense from terror but also freedom from hunger and homelessness

14. The Patriot Act – do you have something to hide, that you don’t want Uncle Sam finding out about you?

I have nothing to hide and I don’t want anyone snooping into my private life. Period.

15. Are you going to vote on November 2nd, 2004 … human?

I am going to vote, yes

Midweek Music Meme

What is your favorite spooky music, whether Halloween-related or not?

My favorite spooky music is from the old gothic horror soap, Dark Shadows

Wednesday Whatevers

1. When are lies acceptable?

When they are white lies i.e. that’s a nice haircut
2. Is it true that what you don't know can't hurt you?

No – if you don’t know your mate is fooling around you could get an STD
3. What is a spoiled person?

One who expects to be given everything for nothing in return

No entry today

My shoulder is hurting a lot today. I'm not sure what's going on, bursitis, arthritis or some other painitis but I figure rest can only help. So I'm resting.

Rough Week

Little T has been so grouchy this week! I wonder what’s up with him? He doesn’t seem to be sick. Maybe he’s teething. He’s very clinging and whiny and hasn’t slept well. Linda was pretty miserable this morning because Tomas was up most of the night. He would whine and complain every time she left the room or put him down. I suggested that Linda get the playpen out and set T in it, right where he could see her. She did and he fussed and cried but then settled down as long as he could see us.

It’s been a difficult week for all of us. I don’t know what I did to my right shoulder but it ached really bad for the last couple of days. Today it’s not bad unless I try to lift my arm. I was going to see the doctor about it today but she wasn’t in. I have an appointment with a rheumatologist but it’s not until the end of November. If my shoulder begins to hurt more again then I’ll go see my family doctor next week.

I also got into a study being run to test some medications. I’m not sure how much I can say about it. A lot of times the studies are supposed to be confidential. The procedures are similar to the one Rich participated in like 10 years ago. Anyway, TB took me for the evaluation and it ended up being a 4 hour ordeal!

First the doctor asked me a long list of questions to see if I qualified. Some of the questions were very intense and upsetting and at one point, I was broke down and was crying. I guess it’s okay to say what the question was. It had to do with guilt and yes, I feel guilty about a lot. I started crying when I recalled the night Rich died. It doesn’t matter that his cardiologist didn’t think Rich was having a life threatening episode of atrial fibrillation. It doesn’t matter that Rich told me I should go back to bed and get some rest. I keep thinking, I should have stayed with him or dragged him to the hospital.

Once they determined that I did qualify, someone else came in to take my pulse and blood pressure. My pulse was good but the first pressure reading was something like 138/102. The tech waited a few minutes, tried again and it was 130/100 which was a little better. But the third time she tried it was higher again. She did an EKG and that was normal. Then we had to move to another room.

There was a teeny little conference room – actually, it used to be part of a hallway – in the back. The office was very busy and everyone was playing musical rooms. I guess they were taking in several participants that day. Anyway, I was tired and warm (why are doctors’ offices so darn hot?) and so was TB. The coordinator came in and said there was a concern about me qualifying because of my blood pressure. I didn’t mind that too much because I was already worrying about becoming a participant and side effects and stuff like that. Her idea was that I should come back the following week when I’d had a chance to de-stress. They could re-do the blood pressure check and finish up the evaluation.

The doctor who asked me all the questions in the beginning apparently wasn’t enthusiastic about it because he came in and gave me a crash course on transcendental meditation. So I closed my eyes, thought “one” on the exhalating breath and my BP went down to 130/90 and then 130/80. So back we went to another room so that a tech could weigh me and draw my blood. The very last thing we had to do was go through another series of questions by another doc who was filling out forms.

That’s when I felt a little slimy. A couple of times I’d answer a question and the doc’s eyebrows would shoot up. He’d go hmmm and then suggest another possible answer – I had the distinct impression it was to get me to fit a certain profile or something. But I thought, whatever, let me just get through this so we can get out of here and go home.

The coordinator wants me to go back on Monday so I can do yet another blood pressure reading. Then I go back Thursday to answer questions about how I’m feeling. I wonder how I will be feeling considering I’m being weaned off some of the meds I’m taking now.

I can back out anytime I want to.

Things I learned this week:

The media really has set a panic on people about this flu vaccine. Not only are people crossing the border into Canada, they are now going into Mexico hoping to get vaccinated. To their credit, President Bush, John Kerry and running mate John Edwards have all declined to have a flu shot. But prisoners in jails and football players got them. Meanwhile, people over 65 and babies haven’t been able to get vaccinated. What the hell? I worry about little T. The doctor told Linda he didn’t need a shot because he is “healthy”. Yeah, but he is still in that “high risk” 6-23 month old stage. Hopefully we won’t have a bad flu season although new cases are cropping up already.

Margaret Hassan,the head of CARE in Iraq, has been kidnapped by those xxxxx (think of the worst curse word you possibly can) terrorists. She is married to an Iraqi, born in Ireland and also has British citizenship and has spent half her life (she’s 59 or 60) delivering food and medicine to Iraqis. Now a tape has been released of this poor woman, weeping and begging for her life. I’d be scared out of my mind, too, considering the track record for “compassion” those xxxx terrorists have shown.

There is something else I know too. Long before now, if I’d been in Iraq I’d have gotten my butt out of there after Nicholas Berg was butchered. People like Margaret Hassan and other civilian employees (the engineers, the truck drivers and so on) are unprotected. They can be kidnapped easily – as we’ve seen over the last few weeks. I think any foreigner in Iraq now must be totally insane to stay there. Obviously these terrorists do not care about the Iraqi civilians and are going to continue grabbing hostages even if it’s someone doing humanitarian work.

I hate them, those miserable cowardly terrorists.

In the land of the unreal, I just have to quote this before it disappears off the net forever. I noticed that all my yahoo linked news goes bye-bye after some period of time. Here goes:

Robertson: Bush Said No Deaths in Iraq

Wed Oct 20, 5:22 PM ET
By DOUGLASS K. DANIEL, Associated Press Writer
WASHINGTON - Religious broadcaster Pat Robertson says he warned President Bush (news - web sites) before U.S. troops invaded Iraq (news - web sites) that the United States would sustain casualties but that Bush responded, "Oh, no, we're not going to have any casualties."

White House and campaign advisers denied that Bush made the comment, with Karen Hughes saying, "I don't believe that happened. He must have misunderstood or misheard it."
Robertson, in an interview with CNN that aired Tuesday night, said God had told him that the war would be messy and a disaster. When he met with Bush in Nashville before the war Bush did not listen to his advice, Robertson said, and believed Saddam Hussein (news - web sites) was an evil tyrant who needed to be removed.
"He was just sitting there, like, 'I'm on top of the world,' and I warned him about this war," Robertson said.
"I had deep misgivings about this war, deep misgivings. And I was trying to say, 'Mr. President, you better prepare the American people for casualties.' 'Oh, no, we're not going to have any casualties.' 'Well,' I said, 'it's the way it's going to be.' And so, it was messy. The lord told me it was going to be, A, a disaster and, B, messy."
Traveling with Bush in the Midwest, Hughes said political adviser Karl Rove was in the Feb. 10, 2003 meeting with the president and Robertson in Nashville, Tenn., but Bush never said there wouldn't be casualties in Iraq.
"Obviously, we already had casualties in Afghanistan (news - web sites) at the time. If you look at that, that (the comment) was not consistent with what was going on," she said.
White House spokesman Scott McClellan said, "Of course, the president never made such a comment."
Robertson released a statement about Bush late Wednesday in which he said, "I emphatically stated that I believe 'the blessing of heaven is upon him' and I am persuaded that he will win this election and prevail on the war against terror in order to keep America safe from her avowed enemies."
Earlier in the day, Mike McCurry, adviser to the Kerry campaign, said: "We believe President Bush should get the benefit of the doubt here, but he needs to come forward and answer a very simple question — was Pat Robertson telling the truth when he said he didn't think there'd be any casualties or is Pat Robertson lying?"
Robertson, the founder of the Christian Coalition and a candidate for the Republican nomination for president in 1988, said he supports Bush's re-election and believes the president is blessed by God.
"I think God's blessing him, and I think it's one of those things that, even if he stumbles and messes up — and he's had his share of goofs and gaffes — I just think God's blessing is on him," Robertson said. "And you remember, I think the Chinese used to say, you know, it's the blessing of heaven on the emperor. And I think the blessing of heaven is on Bush. It's just the way it is."
In January, Robertson told viewers during his "700 Club" television program that God had told him Bush would win re-election in a blowout." In the CNN interview, Robertson said he believes Bush will win by a "razor-thin" margin but a substantial Electoral College (news - web sites) victory.

Oh yeah? Heaven help us all and deliver us from this man!

What Should You Be for Halloween?

You Should Be Elvis for Halloween!

No Cure for Arthritis

There are shark attorneys advertising on television now, offering to represent people or families of patients who’ve taken vioxx. Vioxx is a medication prescribed to relieve joint pain – like from arthritis. The manufacturer, Merck, pulled the drug of the market because it turns out that Vioxx can bring on a heart attack or stroke. Yikes.

We had a little discussion about it on Widownet. Several of our spouses took Vioxx regularly. Could it have contributed to their deaths? Maybe. Rich took Vioxx for a long time before he died. His knee joint was totally deteriorated and the same was so of his right foot. He was in terrible pain almost all the time and the Vioxx helped relieve it.

Rich’s health was deteriorating. I’ll probably always wonder if the Vioxx or the untreated sleep apnea contributed to his cardiac arrest. Is it worth it to me to pursue it by contacting one of these sharks? No. It won’t change anything. Besides, Merck pulled the drug voluntarily. It’s not like the FDA was doing anything in this case.

Since then, we’ve learned that celebrex and bextra might also cause complications like heart attack because they are all cox-2 inhibitors, meaning that they stop prostaglandin. They also block a substance, another form of prostaglandin, that prevents heart problems. Pfizer makes celebrex and bextra and say they have studies that show celebrex is safe … but they are still being scrutinized carefully.

If all of these drugs are dangerous, what is left to take for arthritis pain? I don’t want to take something that might cause me to have a heart attack!

When my mother was diagnosed with arthritis, the doctors couldn’t do anything to help her manage the pain. She took a lot of aspirin and once or twice the doctors injected her with gold. I remember she used to drink a lot of grapefruit juice … a home remedy, I guess. Maybe I’ll have to do the same thing.

Midweek Music Meme:

What TV show theme song did you like best, even if you didn’t care for the show itself?

My all time favorite TV theme song is from Hill Street Blues and I did like that show very much

Wednesday Whatevers

1. How do you feel about the electoral college voting?

I don’t like it at all because it’s anachronistic and can turn out to be a disaster, as what happened in the 2000 election. Bush did not win the popular vote. He is the first president to have gotten in without the popular vote and now look at us

2. Who defintes what is "cool?"

Beats me. Part of it must be the self confidence the “cool” person exudes

3. How is a believable character in tv, movies, books, etc made?

By giving the person foibles and faults as well as good qualities. It makes the character more like us and so more believeable

10 on Tuesday:

Ten Really Scary Movies

1. The Exorcist
2. Silence of the Lambs
3. Psycho
4. Night of the Living Dead
5. House on Haunted Hill
6. The Sixth Sense
7. Invasion of the Body Snatchers
8. Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?
9. The Shining
10. Rear Window

Monday

Linda went to the pulmonologist today, a sort of intake consultation. They are going to call her within the next week or 10 days to come in for an overnight sleep study.

I remember when I had that done the summer of 2002, just before I moved to NJ. TB still has nightmares about that drive! He was totally unfamiliar with most of the roads on Long Island. He was going to drop me off at North Shore and then stay with my kids overnight. After he left, I had this feeling so I called him and sure enough, he wasn't sure where to go but I was able to figure out where he was and get him back on the LI Expressway.

Anyway, I was hooked up and wired all over to different machines. I wondered if I could fall asleep but I did with relative ease. I woke up when the techs came in to hook me up to a CPAP machine. It turns out I really did have sleep apnea -- I wouldn't have known if it hadn't been for TB. He recognized the symptoms because he has it too. It's not something you want to have and it can cause some dangerous side effects but sleeping with the machine hasn't been traumatic. If Linda does have apnea too then having a CPAP will alleviate her symptoms.

Kennan came over again tonight to visit Tomas. I'm really beginning to believe there is hope there. Tomas is just too adorable for words! He's making some progress in supporting himself and trying to stand. He still can't creep or crawl and so I'm thinking, maybe he'll just get up and walk and that's that.

The election is in two weeks and we will vote for either Bush or Kerry. Then, thank God, all the negative ads will be gone. Everyday there are new commercials on TV and on the radio, one candidate bashing the other. I am so sick of the ads and the bickering. I'll be so happy when all that is over. I am going to vote for who I'm going to vote for and pray that this time, none of the ballots get screwed up.

There’s a story on the internet now about a group of soldiers in Iraq that refused orders to deliver some fuel. They were supposed to use a dangerous route and they were concerned because their trucks weren’t armored. Some stories call it a “mutiny” and I suppose it was because they refused to carry out a direct order. But do soldiers really have to obey what might be a suicidal mission?

I thought our soldiers were supposed to be protected by armor! Supposedly, the short supply of equipment and lack of protection was nothing new. When he was in command in Iraq (until this past summer), General Sanchez warned the Pentagon that the troops was on a really low readiness level – that is scary. Sanchez said the lack of equipment would affect the ability of the soldiers to fight. The soldiers who mutineed said they told their commanding officers the fuel was contaminated and the equipment wasn’t safe and they were ignored. Why are we giving so much money to Iraq if our soldiers need something to protect them? It’s just all so totally screwed up!

If I had been one of the soldiers, I would have refused to go too. These soldiers have families to think of, people who depend on them. What happens to those families when their soldiers are killed? After the initial outpouring of sympathy, what happens to those widows and widowers and grieving kids and parents?

There is one commercial that still gets to me. A mom says her son was killed in Iraq. He didn't want to go to war but he believed in defending his country. He volunteered to go on a dangerous mission because his buddies were in danger. Well, the mother continues, now they find out that there were no weapons of mass destruction after all. It's hard not to think, my kid was killed for nothing.

It's a terrible tragedy, the war is just a travesty.

QOTW:

Do you believe in ghosts? Would you be willing to spend the night in a place that was allegedly haunted? Would it (your staying there) make a difference if that location was remote (like a house in the woods) or if the place was not remote (like a house in the middle of a large neighborhood)?

I believe that life goes on after death. I think that ghosts are those spirits that were murdered or committed suicide or died a sudden violent death and maybe they don’t realize they’ve passed. Would I stay in a house that was haunted? I wouldn’t knowingly do it. I believe that my grandma was in her house for at least a week after she passed. My mom and I stayed in her house and we had a lot of unexplained situations. The radio in the kitchen would switch from rock back to the easy music she listened to … and no one would be in the kitchen at the time. Or the back door kept getting locked. This was a deadbolt lock that would get turned when no one was around and the door had been left unlocked. Once my mom went out with a load of wash and got locked out. I feel that my loved ones are sometimes near me, looking out for me. Anyway, yes, it would make a difference if the location was remote and if the ghosts were strangers. I definitely would not stay in a house far from anyone else.

Saturday 6:

1. What was your favorite Halloween candy to receive as a child?

I loved candy bars like Hershey’s almond or Almond Joy

2. Of cities you've visited (that you don't live in), which is your favorite and why?

Right now, my favorite is Ocean City, Maryland and it’s because I have wonderful memories of fun times I spent there during my teens and young adulthood

3. What is the oldest appliance in your kitchen (and how old is it)?

It’s probably the coffee maker and I would say it’s at least 5 years old

4. How many broken bones have you suffered in your life time, and when was the most recent?

None broken, knock on wood!

5. Check your caller ID: who is the last person to have called you?

Elizabeth Somebody from the Drenk Center

6. READER'S CHOICE QUESTION #26 from Nettie: What would you say is your biggest "character flaw?"

Procrastination! I would get so much more done if I didn’t waste my time procrastinating! :P

T's day out

Today was the first day that Kennan took Tomas for the day. For the last few weeks, he’s been coming to visit for an hour or so in the evening. He’s practiced feeding and bathing the baby. Tomas has gradually gotten used to his dad and doesn’t scream any more when Kennan holds him. It was hard for Linda to let him go but it was a big step in the right direction.

I missed him. I’m so used to having him here and being able to play with him or hold him that it felt odd not to have him here. You don’t really think about how someone so small could have such a big impact on your life until they go to TN or off for a day trip with dad.

To make matters worse, Heidi threw a giant tantrum. She was mad that we’d bought soda (10 2-liter bottles for $10) when she “needed so many things.” Well, first of all, I wanted the soda because I knew how much she liked it. I wasn’t going to buy what she really wanted, chocolate and candy. But at least there would be diet soda to drink. She has thrown a big fit when there was no soda to drink – she “hates” water and everything else makes her “sick”. So I was totally surprised when she blew.

TB and I tried to talk to her. “What is it that you need?” we asked her. She just kept screaming, forget it forget it. It made no sense. Finally she began screaming that she needed a coat and some socks but here we’d gone and bought soda after saying we had no money, had no money.

Well, that is true but we did have the $10 for the soda.

Anyway, I got very depressed about it all. No Tomas and a hysterically angry Heidi. What to do? Take a nap! Great idea! And so I slept away the afternoon.

I woke up, hearing Little T making a speech in the living room. Yay!

Kennan said that Tomas spent most of the day crying but he’d dealt with it. His father fed the baby a bottle and his mother actually held T! And T fell asleep on her lap! Will wonders never cease!

I really have to admire Linda's inner strength. It was hard for her to let Kennan take Tomas. It was hard not to call him several times. But she did it, got through it.

This could be one of those separated parent situations that actually works.

Your Power Color Is Blue Relationships and feelngs are the most important things to you. You are empathetic and accepting - and good at avoiding conflict. If someone close to you is in pain, it makes you hurt as well. You try to heal the ones you love with your kind and open heart. What's Your Power Color? Take This Quiz Find the Love of Your Life (and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

http://weeklybit.blogspot.com/ The Weekly Bit:
A Bit About Your Average Day for the week of Oct17

1. What is the first hour of your day like? What do you do when you wake up?
I stumble into the kitchen first. If I am the first one up, I start making coffee and then feed the cats. Then I go find my blood pressure and thyroid meds and take them. I get a cup of yogurt, add in 4 ibuprofens and then head into the living room. I turn the TV on, to the news, then go to the speaker and call Billy and Heidi to wake up. Then I just plop for an hour, trying to wake up.

2. What do you do during the course of the day? Are you always busy? Or are you able to take time out and 'smell the flowers' so to speak?
Every day I’m usually on the computer a few hours. I read the news, my email, other journals and bulletin boards and then I try to write creatively for a while. Sometimes I’ll do a chore, like the laundry or vacuum my room. Sometimes I give Linda a break and play with Tomas – always fun for me. I take a nap in the afternoon. Sometimes I go out with TB. Sometimes I just read. It’s not too hectic for me.

3. What is your evening like? Do you go to bed early? Late? How do you relax?
I relax by reading my book. I go to bed anytime between 10 and 11:30. I’ll watch a little TV first, check the latest in the news and in my mailbox, and then go find my book.

Now some word association...I say.... you think...

apple: pie

blue: berry

pie: Thanksgiving

rug: carpet

fall: colors

boy: girl

mean: kind

open: close

hamper: laundry
http://subliminal.lunanina.com/ Unconscious Mutterings:

1. Dimension:: Fourth

2. Roger:: Collins

3. CSI:: NY

4. Passenger:: traveller

5. Thankful:: grateful

6. Has-been:: useless

7. Bambino:: baby

8. Wrinkles:: grandparents

9. Cable TV:: choice

10. Voicemail:: messages
    

Almost back to normal

Linda and T have been home for a couple of days now. It sure is good to have them back. They went to the doctor this morning, though, because of a couple of concerns. Tomas has sounded hoarse and has been coughing a bit but he is fine, thank heavens. Everyone's noticed that Linda is sleeping a lot during the day and feeling tired almost all the time. Maybe she has sleep apnea? It's totally possible. So she is going to do a sleep study and have an echocardiogram to rule out anything going on with her heart. She's anxious about it which is totally understandable!

Otherwise, it's been a fairly uneventful day ... thank heavens!

Weekend Wonderings:

1. Are you one of those people who gets things done quickly, or do you put them off until the last minute?

If it’s something I’m doing on my own, I wait until the last minute

2. Would you say you’re reliable and that people can count on you?

If I say I will do something, I’ll do it so I’m reliable in that way. But I don’t offer that often because I’ve learned it’s too difficult to follow through sometimes.

3. When you’re going to meet someone, are you usually right on time, early, or a few minutes late?

Either right on time or no more than 5 minutes late

Superman 2

I also saw a news item about someone stalking Mel Gibson

Apparently this guy developed some obsession to pray with Mel Gibson after he saw The Passion of the Christ. He's been sending letters and calling and then even showed up in Gibson's church. I'm wondering, why didn't he just pray with the guy? Especially in the church. It might have made the guy go away. I mean, of course the guy could take it further like Mark David Chapman did (he was the disturbed fan that killed John Lennon). On the other hand, maybe that was all this guy needed. Oh well.

Baby Withdrawal

We all miss Little T and it brings us to realize how much we miss all the kids, Brandon, Taylor, Ryan, Nikolas too. The house is so quiet. In one way, Linda's situation has been a sort of blessing for us because we got to see Tomas and play with him every day. We won't have that with the other kids because we're just so far apart. I feel bad for my own kids, that their grandparents are virtual strangers. They haven't seen my parents in years and it's been several months since they saw Fred and Alberta. I feel sad we have that distance with Michele, David & their kids. Time for a meme to distract me.

Ten on Tuesday:

Ten Favorite Quotes from the Movies

Some of my quotes are parts of a conversation from a movie. So I went to the Movie Database to get them right. These are in no particular order:

Network, 1976

Howard Beale : [shouting] You've got to say, 'I'm a HUMAN BEING, Goddamnit! My life has VALUE!' So I want you to get up now. I want all of you to get up out of your chairs. I want you to get up right now and go to the window. Open it, and stick your head out, and yell, 'I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!' I want you to get up right now, sit up, go to your windows, open them and stick your head out and yell - 'I'm as mad as hell and I'm not going to take this anymore!' Things have got to change. But first, you've gotta get mad!... You've got to say, 'I'm as mad as hell, and I'm not going to take this anymore!' Then we'll figure out what to do about the depression and the inflation and the oil crisis. But first get up out of your chairs, open the window, stick your head out, and yell, and say it: [screaming at the top of his lungs] "I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!"

Arthur Jensen : You have meddled with the primal forces of nature, Mr. Beale, and I won't have it. Is that clear? You think you've merely stopped a business deal? That is not the case. The Arabs have taken billions of dollars out of this country, and now they must put it back. It is ebb and flow, tidal gravity. It is ecological balance. You are an old man who thinks in terms of nations and peoples. There are no nations; there are no peoples. There are no Russians. There are no Arabs. There are no third worlds. There is no West. There is only one holistic system of systems; one vast, interwoven, interacting, multivaried, multinational dominion of dollars.

Casablanca, 1942

Rick : Last night we said a great many things. You said I was to do the thinking for both of us. Well, I've done a lot of it since then, and it all adds up to one thing: you're getting on that plane with Victor where you belong.
Ilsa : But, Richard, no, I... I...
Rick : Now, you've got to listen to me! You have any idea what you'd have to look forward to if you stayed here? Nine chances out of ten, we'd both wind up in a concentration camp. Isn't that true, Louie?
Captain Renault : I'm afraid Major Strasser would insist.
Ilsa : You're saying this only to make me go.
Rick : I'm saying it because it's true. Inside of us, we both know you belong with Victor. You're part of his work, the thing that keeps him going. If that plane leaves the ground and you're not with him, you'll regret it. Maybe not today. Maybe not tomorrow, but soon and for the rest of your life.
Ilsa : But what about us?
Rick : We'll always have Paris. We didn't have, we, we lost it until you came to Casablanca. We got it back last night.
Ilsa : When I said I would never leave you.
Rick : And you never will. But I've got a job to do, too. Where I'm going, you can't follow. What I've got to do, you can't be any part of. Ilsa, I'm no good at being noble, but it doesn't take much to see that the problems of three little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world. Someday you'll understand that. Now, now... Here's looking at you kid.

Field of Dreams, 1989

John Kinsella : Is this heaven?
Ray Kinsella : It's Iowa.
John Kinsella : Iowa? I could have sworn this was heaven.
[John starts to walk away]
Ray Kinsella : Is there a heaven?
John Kinsella : Oh yeah. It's the place where dreams come true.
[Ray looks around, seeing his wife playing with their daughter on the porch]
Ray Kinsella : Maybe this is heaven.

Voice: If you build it, he will come

Forrest Gump, 1994

Forrest Gump : Mama always said life was like a box a chocolates, never know what you're gonna get.

Jenny Curran : Were you scared in Vietnam?
Forrest Gump : Yes. Well, I-I don't know. Sometimes it would stop raining long enough for the stars to come out... and then it was nice. It was like just before the sun goes to bed down on the bayou. There was always a million sparkles on the water... like that mountain lake. It was so clear, Jenny, it looked like there were two skies one on top of the other. And then in the desert, when the sun comes up, I couldn't tell where heaven stopped and the earth began. It's so beautiful.
Jenny Curran : I wish I could've been there with you.
Forrest Gump : You were.

Harvey, 1950

Elwood P. Dowd : Well, I've wrestled with reality for 35 years, doctor, and I'm happy to state I finally won out over it.

Parenthood, 1989

Tod : You know, Mrs. Buchman, you need a license to buy a dog, to drive a car - hell, you even need a license to catch a fish. But they'll let any butt-reaming asshole be a father.

[Gil has been complaining about his complicated life; Grandma wanders into the room]
Grandma : You know, when I was nineteen, Grandpa took me on a roller coaster.
Gil : Oh?
Grandma : Up, down, up, down. Oh, what a ride!
Gil : What a great story.
Grandma : I always wanted to go again. You know, it was just so interesting to me that a ride could make me so frightened, so scared, so sick, so excited, and so thrilled all together! Some didn't like it. They went on the merry-go-round. That just goes around. Nothing. I like the roller coaster. You get more out of it.

Superman

Sometime in 1978, I remember going to a movie called Superman. I went with a friend – maybe it was Daina. I had never heard of the actor who was starring as Superman. He was tall and handsome and exuded power and strength from every pore. Like most big men, though, he seemed extraordinarily gentle. Christopher Reeve fit the part well. Boy, he was handsome – and not much older than me, just 2 years. I went back to watch all the sequels. Just to show he was not just Superman, Reeve did other good movies like Somewhere in Time and Deathtrap.

He was in a terrible accident in 1995. He was thrown from his horse and broke his neck. For awhile, no one was sure if he’d live or not. The doctors were very pessimistic and they said he could be paralyzed from the neck down. Just thinking of Reeve being paralyzed and unable to move was horrifying enough because he was so physically fit. He had a wife and a little boy. Sometimes I thought it would have been better if he’d died.

But he didn’t. I’m sure those early days were horrible when he and his family dealt with the traumatic realities of the accident. Later, though, I began reading reports about Reeve and physical therapy. He had people helping him in physical therapy for hours every day. He used to be attached to a ventilator because he couldn’t breathe on his own. So I was totally amazed and awed when he was able to get off the respirator for hours. Talk about strength of will! This was a real Superman.

He wanted to walk again. That was his goal and he continued to exercise. He gradually began to regain control of some parts of his body, his hand, his ankles, his finger … and he began to speak out about the need for more spinal cord injury research. He joined in with other activists urging the use of stem cell research to help people with Parkinson’s, with diabetes, spinal cord injuries and other conditions.

John Kerry mentioned Christopher Reeve during his second debate with President Bush. Who had any idea that Reeve was already sick, trying to fight the systemic infection he had.

Quadriplegics and paraplegics are at risk for developing nasty bed sores from being in one position too long. The sores can become infected and that’s what happened to Christopher Reeve. His body couldn’t take anymore and he went into cardiac arrest.

I feel so sad that he didn’t reach his goal here on earth. In heaven, he is walking and running and moving effortlessly without the weight of his paralyzed and useless body. God bless him. He is an inspiration to everyone.

Strange Happening

Is my computer possessed? It sure seemed like it after we got back from the movies this afternoon! I opened Outlook and then tried to open Internet Explorer. Well, it was like IE wasn't even there. TB tried to figure out what happened to it. I'm not sure if it's a virus or what but TB got everything working again by going to an earlier date. Very weird.

The Weekly Bit:

A Bit About Scary Stuff
Well its that time of the year again...Halloween will soon be here.
I always enjoy this holiday. I think its because of the costumes and free candy. But also because during this time of the year, they tend to run lots of scary movies on tv, new scary flicks come into theaters and it's ok to believe in the paranormal, if only for a moment. So without further ado, this weeks bit is about scary stuff....

1. Do you believe in ghosts, spirits, the supernatural? Have you ever had a supernatural experience?

I believe that life goes on after we die and I believe I have had after death experiences/communications from my loved ones

2. What is your favorite scary film? book?

My favorite scary film is Psycho and favorite book is ’Salem’s Lot

3. Do you still dress up for Halloween? What is your fav costume?

I haven’t dressed up since we moved from Maryland. My favorite costume is clown. I had a multicolored wig and it was always easy to find baggy, mismatched clothes. The makeup was easy to do too and it was always fun for me to go around in costume with the kids

Unconscious Mutterings:

I say … and you think …

1. Spacious:: roomy
2. Crash:: accident
3. Autobiography:: life story
4. Sparkly:: glittery
5. Wild Thing:: The Trogs
6. Haagen-Das:: ice cream
7. Sci-fi:: Star Trek
8. Voice:: speak
9. Boy Scouts:: organization
10. Grief:: profound loss

What Natural Disaster Are You?

What Natural Disaster are you? Take the quiz!

Well, I'm not too surprised, especially after this day.

This morning, we took Billy for his SAT. The school was about 30-40 minutes away (what else is new?) and our first plan was to just hang out until the test was over at 11:30. We changed our minds though and headed home. The plan from there was to take the girls along on the trip back. Kristin needed to buy a gift for her friend's birthday.

We got back to the school around 11:20. We waited. And waited. And waited. I began looking around the parking lot near noon. There were lots of cars parked there, many of them with waiting parents behind the wheel. Okay ... so we weren't in the wrong place.

Billy finally came out around 12:30. It wasn't his fault. The proctors were all totally disorganized and wasted a lot of valuable time. Well, in the meantime, the girls had become impatient and irritable and TB and I pretty much had had it with cars and waiting. We went home. Kristin will have to do her shopping tomorrow. :P

And I miss T and Linda. I am so used to them being around it is just weird not to hear T "talking" or bouncing in his saucer. They went to TN to visit Michele, David & the kids. They'll be gone a week.

In Other Words:

What on earth would a man do with himself if something did not stand in his way?
 H.G. Wells

What would we do without a challenge? What if we could just go out and get everything we wanted or needed without any effort at all. Life would be boring and we wouldn’t learn to appreciate what we have!

Saturday 6:

1. What is your favorite cartoon show?

It was the Bugs Bunny/Road Runner hour

2. I found this on Wil's journal: Take the quiz...What natural disaster are you?

What Natural Disaster are you? Take the quiz!

3. What was the design of the last postage stamp you used?

An American flag

4. What was the last pill you took?

Anti-anxiety medication

5. It's your ultimate breakfast: what's on the plate?
Blueberry pancakes, eggs over easy, bacon and a corn muffin!

6. READER'S CHOICE QUESTION #26 from SpringsNymph and Neil:

a) When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up?

a writer

b) Are you anywhere close to that dream now?

Yes and no

c) Now that you're in the "real world," is your current job now really what you want to do for a living?

When I was working, I enjoyed interpreting very much

d) If not, what would you ultimately like to do?
If I’d had the college degree I would have liked to go on and become an interpreter coordinator

Finally some good news

TB and I are at the end of our financial rope. We talked today about which bills we should pay and which ones we should try to work something out with the creditors. The funny (maybe not so ha-ha funny but weird funny) thing is that the creditors all said that we are current and we can't make any special arrangements until we are delinquent. Isn't that a kick in the head? Here we are trying to head off trouble and protect our credit ...

I was feeling angry that this was happening to us as a result of what the damn insurance carrier did to us. We wouldn't be able to get our good name back, either, because I'm sure we wouldn't be able to sue them. But TB did call his lawyer to let him know we were in dire straits and didn't know what to do. The lawyer had already sent a letter to the insurance carrier stating: they'd cut TB off because their robotic doctor said TB couldn't be helped by any further therapy or surgery. Meanwhile, TB had the surgery, it was a success, and he's doing much better now.

Our lawyer called the carrier's lawyer, who'd already been in touch with the company. Yes, they acknowledge that they screwed up and now they have to calculate everything they own. Their lawyer told our lawyer the company would issue a partial check so we don't go down drowning.

Well, thank God. And we found a credit card in TB's name and it has a ton of credit available on it. The Lord works in mysterious ways all right but now we don't have to worry so much.

Midweek Music Meme:

What song reduces you to giggles, or is guaranteed to cheer you up with the sheer absurdity of it when you need a good laugh?

I was just thinking about the upcoming holiday season. I’m looking forward to listening to round-the-clock holiday music. We didn’t have such marathons in Maryland so it was a real treat for me to find such a station when we were living on Long Island. Well, one morning I heard “Dominick the Donkey” and I started howling with laughter right at the get-go when I heard the chorus. I’d never heard this song before. I laugh every single time I hear it, no matter how often. And I love to sing along with it!

Dominick The Donkey
By: Lou Monte

Chorus)- Ay, Jing-a-di-jing hee haw hee haw
It's Dominick the Donkey.
jing-a-di-jing hee haw hee haw.
De Italian Christmas Donkey.
Lalalalalalalalala. lalalalalaladidooda.

Children sing and clap dare hands and Dominick starts ta dance.
Dey talk Italian to him and he even understands

Wednesday Whatevers

1. What would society be like without religion?

I started to say we’d have chaos and anarchy but then I thought some more about it. Some of the worst violence in the world resulted from religious clashes. John Lennon had a song, “Imagine”, which was about a world where there’s no religion:

Imagine there's no heaven,
It's easy if you try,
No hell below us,
Above us only sky,
Imagine all the people
living for today...

You may say Im a dreamer,
but Im not the only one,
I hope some day you'll join us,
And the world will live as one.

So … is this what it might be like? I have no idea.

2. Why are separate languages developed?

Well, the story in the Bible says everyone used to speak the same language. They decided to build a tower way up into the sky to touch or almost touch heaven. God took exception to that because if they could make that tower then they could get together and do other things. So He jumbled all the languages so that no one understood each other anymore.

We all live in different parts of the world now and our words are rooted in different languages. We have different dialects, even within the same language. So our words might be similar to others’ but there will still be differences. For instance, in English we say mother and in German we say mutter. They sound alike but are different.

I don’t know if there would be any advantage to everyone speaking one language. I think we’d still have the same problems communicating.

3. How does nature affect us?

I always feel better when I am at the beach or even at a park. There’s something uplifting about being in the fresh air and watching little animals or fish or crabs or what have you. I feel better during spring and summer, when the days are longer and we have more sunshine. I get cabin fever when we have a long spell of rain. I’m sure other people.feel the same way so I would say that nature affects our mood as well as our

The Money Came Back

Most of it anyway. Billy found it under his door this morning.

In Other Words:

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.
 Eleanor Roosevelt, 'This Is My Story,' 1937

This is one of my favorite quotes and a sig line I use frequently. Insecure people might think, well, I’m not giving my consent either. The bottom line, though, is if they don’t have good self esteem someone else’s words could hurt them and make them feel inferior I’ve learned to believe in myself and to value who I am. No one else can do or say anything to make me feel inferior.

You're a Spring. You usually are very close-knit
with your friends and value everyone freidnship
you have. You're a real people person and
everyone loves how friendly you are. You're
good with encouraging people but usually don't
like to be the center of attention. You are a
social butterfly and probably are in several
circles of friends but it's just because you're
well liked and you make people comfortable.
You're both fun and wise but you are very
realistic about life.


What season are you? (pics)
brought to you by Quizilla

Ten on Tuesday:

Top 10 things you'd do if you never had to work again

1. Write
2. Surf the net
3. go on vacation
4. travel
5. sleep late
6. stay up late
7. read whenever I want
8. listen to music whenever I want
9. go to the beach
10. travel some more

Tuesday Newsday:

Respect for the dead

>b> Professor Ralph Begleiter sues to get coffin photos. The Pentagon has refused to release those photos, saying it has begun enforcing a policy installed in 1991 intended to respect the privacy of the families of the dead soldiers.

1. Do you think this is really the reason the administration does not want those coffins shown?

I’m not sure. Part of me wants to say yes because publicizing the grief of a family is distatsteful and invasive. Part of me is more cynical, though, and thinks that there’s an ulterior motive … the Pentagon and administration doesn’t want us reminded of the dreadful cost of this awful mess in Iraq.

2. Do you think the pictures should be shown? Why or why not?

I have mixed feelings about that too. On the one hand, I think some people need to see what this war is costing us. On the other hand, it can be hurtful to the families to see pictures of their loved ones’ coffins. A picture can be used over and over again, which would be an ongoing reminder.

3. What about other pictures of the destruction of Iraq. Search for "Iraq" on this page to see some pretty horrifying pictures if you want to see what I'm talking about.

These are terrible pictures of the ravages of war. I can understand why the media would be selective about publishing some pictures, especially those of the dead children. The pictures were shown in the Arab world and I’m sure that they inspired horror and hate. The media did show us pictures of the torture at Abu Ghraib and boy, that sure inspired feelings of revulsion in all of us. Should they be shown, all of the pictures? If these pictures horrify people enough that they think several times about going to war then I’m all for it.

Agita

I have a bad dose of it this evening. TB and I talked to Billy about our funds being tight right now and so he was going to pick up the cost of karate lessons until we hear from someone and get a check from that vampiric third party carrier that cut off TB's workman's comp. So he was cool with that and he had a lesson scheduled for this evening. Since it's the first week of a new month, he made sure he'd taken money out from his account to pay for October's classes.

He was rather upset when he came downstairs. He said to me, "We need to go to the bank tomorrow so I can take out more money."

"Why?" I was surprised.

"Because the money I had is gone."

I know what it's like to feel as if your jaw has hit the floor. TB and I went through the usual questions -- could you have left it somewhere else? Did it fall behind the drawer?

Billy said he'd hidden the money because he wanted to make sure it didn't disappear. See, this isn't the first time money or something valuable has gone missing from his room. I felt sick to my stomach. Tomorrow TB is buying a lock for Billy's door.

We announced that if the money turned up we wouldn't press the issue any further -- but we'd still get the lock. If it doesn't show up, there are going to be some consequences.

I hate this.

Kennan is here this evening. He gave Little T a bath. I don't know what he's doing now but whatever it is, the baby doesn't like it. I am hiding out in the bedroom, listening to music and trying to relax.

QOTW:

Suppose that income taxes still had to paid… but instead of going to the government, your dollars would go to the charity or non-profit organization of your choice. Where would you want your money to go?

I would want my money to go to soup kitchens so they could stock their pantries and help feed the hungry. I don’t see any other government intervention happening anytime soon and I think hunger and homelessness are critical problems in our country.

Sunday

The Weekly Bit:

A Bit of Random Questions for the week of Oct 3...enjoy!

1. What is your favorite thing about fall? Is it the weather? Halloween?

My favorite thing about fall is the lovely scenery, after the leaves have changed colors

2. Do you have any pets?

yes, 2 cats and ADD (a dumb dog)

3. What is your favorite comfort food? Chicken soup, chocolate cake...etc...

Chocolate, chocolate, and more chocolate

4. Do you work? Full time? Part time? Do you like what you do or are you looking for something else?

I used to work but I’m not now because of injuries in my hands and shoulder

5. What is your favorite hobby?

reading

6. Who is your favorite author? What is your favorite book?

My favorite author is Stephen King. My favorite book however isn’t written by King. It’s Outlander by Diana Gabaldon

7. Recommend a good movie.

That’s running now? Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow

8. Do you consider yourself a wild child or are you calm and collected?

I think I’m a little of both

9. What is your greatest accomplishment?

So far … parenting my kids

10. Finish this sentence...
I have never _______________________.

given up on life

Unconscious Mutterings:

I say … and you think …

1. Courage:: bravery
2. Stamina:: endurance
3. Leader:: President
4. Idea:: thought
5. Rockstar:: Bono
6. Dew:: grass
7. Guards:: protectors
8. Lenny:: Bruce
9. Alliance:: friendship
10. Cigarettes:: cancer

What a day

Poor Little T! He had an awful spell of something this afternoon. We went to the movies to see The Forgotten. Everything was okay until we got past the coming previews. When the movie started, Tomas started fussing. Linda tried to quiet him but wasn't having any luck. She got up and left the theater for a few minutes and then came back. As soon as she sat back down, though, Tomas began to cry again. I tried to hold him and that didn't work so she left the theater again.

She was gone a long time. I saw Heidi leave to go to the bathroom and I figured I would go next and just check on the baby. But when Heidi got back, she'd seen Linda who asked her to get me. I went out and poor Linda and T! He was crying and nothing was working for her. She looked upset and drained. I took Tomas and began walking up and down with him, thinking maybe he had a bad spell of gas. Sometimes he'd arch his back. He'd start to calm down and then he'd begin screaming again.

I felt his head and he wasn't warm at all. I didn't think he was sick with any kind of bug. I wondered if the yogurt he had for lunch was a little sour or spoiled. It had seemed fine. I felt so bad for the poor little guy and for Linda too. She seemed almost in tears herself. So I was going to take him outside and walk around with him but first I needed to go to the bathroom.

Well...when I returned, Tomas was giggling! Linda was jiggling him on her knee and moving from one side to the other. That was a relief!

Within minutes the movie was over and people began to pour out from the theater. Tomas began crying loudly again. TB and the kids came out and he carried Tomas out. Things were okay in the car for a while but then the baby began to scream and cry again. It was just awful. There was nothing we could do except try to comfort him. Finally, finally he fell asleep!

Since then, he's woken up and he's been almost back to his normal self. I wish I knew what made him so miserable!

In Other Words:

Man's mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions.
 Oliver Wendell Holmes

Once you learn something new, it opens your mind up to new possibilities as well as new discoveries. Once you learn something new, you can’t go back to the smaller set of facts you knew before.

Meeting of the Minds

Terrorism: have you modified any aspect of your lifestyle as a result of the events of 9/11? why or why not?

I would say that I haven’t changed my lifestyle at all. I didn’t fly before 9/11 and that was because I’m afraid to. It has nothing to do with 9/11. Sometimes I am scared at the thought of going somewhere and there’s a terrorist attack. Sometimes I’m afraid there will be another attack and a nuclear explosion. I can’t be paralyzed by that fear, though. I don’t let myself think about it most of the time. I want to enjoy my life and not be afraid.

The Saturday 6:

1. Which of the following do you trust more: a politician, a televangelist, a lawyer, a reporter, or a doctor?

I would trust a doctor more than the others

2. What's the last song you liked enough that you actually took the time to look up the lyrics?

Oh boy … I’ve looked up the lyrics of a lot of older songs mostly because I was mishearing the words. I wanted to know the correct lyrics. The last one I looked up was “Caught in the Middle With You”.

3. Which deceased relative would you most like to spend one more afternoon with?

Rich. If he doesn’t count as a deceased relative, then it would be my grandmother

4. What is your preferred brand for: a) toothpaste, b) soap, c) shampoo, d) laundry detergent

a. Crest
b. Dove
c. Suave Aloe Vera
d. Fab


5. What is your favorite poem?

“Mother to Son” by Langston Hughes

6. READER'S CHOICE QUESTION #25 from Tara: How did your parents select your first name? Were you named after a particular friend/relative/fictional character or did they just like the name?

I’m named for my mother’s great aunt Cassandra. My middle name May is the same as my grandma’s.

Who Should You Vote For?

You Should Vote For Kerry

Though You'd Rather Vote for Michael Moore