In the years since Rich died, I've put on an enormous amount of weight. In the back of my mind I knew I was at risk for diabetes, high blood pressure, heart attack and all kinds of other unpleasantries. The thought would come to the front of my mind and I'd worry so much, I'd end up gaining more weight instead of losing it. So I kept putting it to the back of my head hoping I'd get the weight off before it was too late.
I look back at the weight I gained after I stopped smoking and had kids and I remember the midwife saying to me if I didn't get all of it off again before 40 I would have a lot of trouble from it.
Yup.
I think I was in pretty good shape 5 years ago. Now I have high blood pressure, a collapsed arch, fibromyalgia, painful joints...and diabetes.
I haven't been feeling well or myself lately and went to the doctors, my OBGYN first. She is the one who discovered that my blood sugar was very high and so I went to my family doctor. I hadn't had any blood work in about a year and so I went and had blood drawn a few days ago. I got the results in the mail today and boy, that sugar is really high! I also noticed my cholesterol is above normal.
Funny...I was just talking to the therapist about how to prod myself into getting my act together. What can I say to myself to make me get serious about all this?
And she said, "How about...'I don't want to die'?"
Yeah, that's a good one!
This is not going to be easy. I found a quote that I'm going to repeat to myself by Winston Churchill: "Never never never give up."
Posted by Cassie at May 6, 2006 03:50 PM | TrackBack