Scribblings

Spam

This blog seems to get an overload of spam. I think there had to be over 100 messages this morning and deleting them all was very tedious. :P I am feeling very depressed anyway and didn't sleep well. I missed an appointment with Dr. R because I couldn't get my act together to go. It sounded like it was pouring outside and I just couldn't deal with that. Besides, what kind of doctor sets appointments so darn early in the morning anyway? Mine was for 6:45 AM.

I'd also gotten dismaying news from Dr. R's secretary. The health insurance said that all visits were covered 100% ... as long as they weren't med review appointments. So the secretary is telling me that we owe the office $100 and I about died. She said, in self defense, I guess, that SHE had just found out herself. Well, that doesn't help does it? So she and Dr. R were supposed to discuss what to do about the $100.

And my feeling this morning was ... the hell with all of it.

The dog was barking barking barking in the early morning which didn't help matters. TB got Billy up around 5 to deal with the dog and apparently they got into it. When I finally did get up, Billy was very upset and said TB was giving the dog away as soon as he (Billy) leaves for college, that it didn't matter what I (me) said because he (TB) is the head of the household. Make sense? It made my head ache. It's just one thing more on top of all the other crap.

The truth is, the dog is a PITA and I can't deal with him. I don't think it's fair that Billy gets to go away for 4 years and leave us stuck with this dog no one else wants. Billy says Kristin will take care of the dog, even in the middle of the night, because he is going to pay her.

I think the Prozac must not be working anymore. This stuff shouldn't be significant enough to make me want to crawl under the bed and hide but that's what I want to do.

I have no hope of seeing the baby. Linda is being hard headed and hard hearted. She told her sister she has a job now and the car is running. I'm not sure I even believe it. Anyway, she is "too busy" to make plans for us to see the baby and it's not a good idea right now and all this other garbage. Whatever. She wants to keep the baby away so I'm just going to get used to that idea and I'll be dipped if I will make myself this vulnerable again to kids.